Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Daily joke thread
#11
[Image: Tuesday1.jpg]
Governmental dependance makes for poor self reliance.

"What could possibly go wrong with a duct tape boat?"  Cody Lundin

The best defense against evil men are good men with violent skill sets.
Reply
#12
Artery -- Study of paintings
Bacteria -- Back door of cafeteria
Barium -- What doctors do when treatment fails
Bowel -- Letter like A.E.I.O.U
Caesarean section -- District in Rome
Cat scan -- Searching for kitty
Cauterize -- Made eye contact with her
Colic -- Sheep dog
Coma -- A punctuation mark
Congenital -- Friendly
D&C -- Where Washington is
Diarrhea -- Journal of daily events
Dilate -- To live long
Enema -- Not a friend
Fester -- Quicker
Fibula -- A small lie
G.I. Series -- Soldiers' ball game
Grippe -- Suitcase
Hangnail -- Coathook
Impotent -- Distinguished, well known
Intense pain -- Torture in a teepee
Labor pain -- Got hurt at work
Medical staff -- Doctor's cane
Morbid -- Higher offer
Nitrate -- Cheaper than day rate
Node -- Was aware of
Outpatient -- Person who had fainted
Pelvis -- Cousin of Elvis
Post operative -- Letter carrier
Protein -- Favoring young people
Rectum -- It almost killed him
Recovery room -- Place to do upholstery
Rheumatic -- Amorous
Scar -- Rolled tobacco leaf
Secretion -- Hiding anything
Seizure -- Roman emperor
Serology -- Study of knighthood
Tablet -- Small table
Terminal illness -- Sickness at airport
Tibia -- Country in North Africa
Tumor -- An extra pair
Urine -- Opposite of you're out
Varicose -- Located nearby
Vein -- Conceited
Reply
#13
This is a good one! The quote of the week:

“I don’t think we’re at war with Islam. I don’t think we’re at war with all Muslims. I think we’re at war with jihadists,” Clinton said."
Reply
#14
(11-16-2015, 03:30 AM)JRSC Wrote: This is a good one! The quote of the week:

“I don’t think we’re at war with Islam. I don’t think we’re at war with all Muslims. I think we’re at war with jihadists,” Clinton said."

Just as a refresher: All jihadists are muslims. The muslim way of life is called islam. So, if we are at war with jihadists, then we are at war with islam.

I had to go get a ham sandwich to think about this one. But as we all know, Clinton is a pathological liar.
Reply
#15
Your right! When I read this I couldn't help but laugh. Trying to make herself look smart she said the stupidest thing.
Reply
#16
Ultimate gun accessory: http://www.thetacsac.com/products/the-tacsac

[Image: ballz.jpg]
Reply
#17
[Image: FNn87RO.jpg]
Governmental dependance makes for poor self reliance.

"What could possibly go wrong with a duct tape boat?"  Cody Lundin

The best defense against evil men are good men with violent skill sets.
Reply
#18
[Image: e384a655.jpg]
Governmental dependance makes for poor self reliance.

"What could possibly go wrong with a duct tape boat?"  Cody Lundin

The best defense against evil men are good men with violent skill sets.
Reply
#19
[Image: amp-quot-decepticons-amp-quot-a-good-rea...728195.jpg]
Governmental dependance makes for poor self reliance.

"What could possibly go wrong with a duct tape boat?"  Cody Lundin

The best defense against evil men are good men with violent skill sets.
Reply
#20
From Rodney Dangerfield:

I come from a stupid family. During the Civil War my great uncle fought for the west!

Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home.

I was tired one night and I went to the bar to have a few drinks. The bartender asked me, "What'll you have?" I said, "Surprise me." He showed me a naked picture of my wife.

And we were poor too. Why, if I wasn't born a boy, I'd have nothing to play with !

when I was a kid I was poor. I used to go to orgies to eat the grapes.

I went to see my doctor... Doctor Vidi-boom-ba. Yeah...I tell you, with my doctor, I don't get no respect. ....I told him, "I've swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills." He told me to have a few drinks and get some rest.

I told him I think my wife has V.D. he gave himself a shot of penicillin

Last week I saw my psychiatrist. I told him, "Doc, I keep thinking I'm a dog." He told me to ..." get off the couch."

Once when I was lost I saw a policeman and asked him to help me find my parents. I said to him, "Do you think we'll ever find them?" He said, "I don't know kid. There are so many places they can hide."


I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.

I met a girl ...she was so ugly that when I bent down to pet her cat it turned out to be the hair on her legs.

My wifes cooking is so bad that the flies pitched in to fix the screen door. I leave dental floss in the kitchen to watch the roaches hang themselves.

I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand.

I bought a new Japanese car, I turned on the radio ... I don't understand a word they're saying.

My wife's not to smart. I told her our kids were spoiled. she said, "all kids smell that way".
Governmental dependance makes for poor self reliance.

"What could possibly go wrong with a duct tape boat?"  Cody Lundin

The best defense against evil men are good men with violent skill sets.
Reply


Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
Smile Bacon thread David 7 2,443 09-19-2017, 11:30 AM
Last Post: bmyers

Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 2 Guest(s)